Hypoallergenic Pets

On a not so recent airplane trip, I had the misfortune of being placed in a seat next to a young woman who had a “service dog.”  Why a normally appearing 27-year-old even needed a service dog remains a mystery to me.  When I asked her specifically (before I found a different seat further away), she said it was to remind her when to take her pills.  I don’t know if the dog had an internal alarm clock or what. Apparently it could somehow tell time.  I didn’t see it wearing a paw watch.

Like many people, I am allergic to pet dander–especially dogs and cats.  But then again, my allergies could be more extensive, I don’t know. I rarely have to sit next to an alligator or panda bear.

And fortunately, I do not have asthma and have to gasp for breath during an entire flight. I just produce a quart of snot an hour and watch my eyes go to half mast as they slowly swell shut.

This issue recently resurfaced as we approach the Thanksgiving holiday. I am looking forward to seeing my oldest brother and his wife but was informed that he was bringing his hypoallergenic dogs–which apparently don’t even shed. Of course, being a scientist and not a lover of pets, I don’t believe this for a moment.

But I’ll make him a deal.  If he is willing to take a piece of homemade taffy and rub it on his dog’s back and then eat it, I will let the animal sit on my lap. Of course, I’ll still need that box of tissue to help clean up the snot.